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"Welcome to the sound of the eighties"

TOTP 80.26 28/08/80

BBCFour repeat here.
Full chart here.

Presented by Peter Powell and B.A. Robertson

pic: popscene

Well we're back off our holidays but there are cases to be unpacked, washing to be done and plants to be watered so just a quick run-through this week.

First of all I'd just like to reiterate my view that B.A. Robertson is/was a burke and is/was never funny. Peter Powell was always a bit borderline embarrassing, but usually redeemed by his tastes in music. Not so this time I'm afraid. On with the show...

Ok well it's the usual 'preview' which interestingly puts the two promo videos (David Bowie and Gary Numan - oooh the irony) up first followed by a few other minor acts.

The Barracudas - Summer Fun
It's the novelty band up first of course, in true TOTP tradition. An appropriate choice as it's already late August and probably raining. Equally appropriately, this got nowhere.

Gary Numan - I Die: You Die
More summer fun! Not! Gazza's back with another new single, and like its predecessor We Are Glass is not from the forthcoming album. Ergo his millions of fans rushed out and bought the 7"(*) and made it a new entry at no. 8. Promo video only of course in which Gary sits in his car (where he feels safest of all), lurks in front of a microphone and wanders down dark and empty corridors. I can't hide my love of this track but the video is totally cringe-worthy and dates it incredibly, as most videos do, turning Gaz into a parody of himself. (*lovely piano version of Down in the Park on the B side btw).

The Selecter - The Whisper
In which Pauline has evidently abandoned her boy-ish sharp black suit 'n' trilby in favour of a more Thatcher-esque affair, although she continues to bounce around a lot like the rest of the band. Some kind of attempt to bring the ska sound into the 80s? Oh dear.

Mike Berry  - The Sunshine of Your Smile
"Whereof one cannot speak, thereof one must be silent." - Ludwig Wittgenstein.

The Skids - Circus Games
Oh still about, are they? Actually I've always quite liked The Skids so nice to see them back on, and with a good tune too. More smart clothing in an attempt to 'modernise' their image, although I must confess I preferred their 'modernist' look. This made no. 32 and so possibly their last appearance on the Pops. Question: Why is Jobson sucking his finger at the beginning of this?

Elton John - Sartorial Eloquence
Former TOTP guest-presenter Reg really was struggling at this point in his career and this kind of dirge with such a difficult title wasn't getting him anywhere either. But as we well know he was one of those 70s artists who would go on to re-invent themselves for the eighties. Hang on in there Reg.

Sue Wilkinson - You've Got to be a Hustler...
Second Pops performance for Sue and pals and she's been tarted up a fair bit this time, spandex 'trousers' 'n' all that, making her a kind of raunchy Sheena Easton, if you will. The keyboardist has even tried to copy her look. Still struggling at no. 25 though and got no higher.

Ian Dury & the Blockheads - I Want to Be Straight
Another throwback to the late 70s (see The Selecter, Skids above) and frankly the geezer's past his best. Obviously on some kind of post-70s hangover/hiatus, Dury confesses that he wishes to turn over a new leaf, and stop misbehaving himself. Nobody believed a word of it of course.

Village People - Can't Stop the Music
Yet more late 70s stuff still dragging on through .. Where are the eighties?????

Judas Priest - United
So after Village People what do you get? Judas bleedin' Priest! Lots of leather and Marshall amps and a singer looking like he'd much rather be somewhere else. The kids seem to be enjoying it, but oh my God .. what a very disappointing show this has turned out to be.

Top 10 rundown and then...

David Bowie - Ashes to Ashes
Thank Goodness for that! Sir David has come to save us all by letting us hear something modern and eighties and showing Gary Numan how a video should be made in this day and age. Second and final week at no. 1 (oops, spoiler) but the legacy lives on.

OK, end of a rather abysmal show, and it's the customary 'let the kids go mad on stage' moment. Thank you B A Robertson for nothing.

The Beat  - Best Friend
A bit of quality ska to play out on, although of course it was the other A side 'Stand Down Margaret' that was selling the single.

A show hardly worth coming back off our holidays for; things can only get better. Can't they? See you next week, sort of.

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